Here’s an excerpt from my up and coming new book, “The Art of Feeling Good”, available soon!
Ahhhh the lovers; emotional and sensual bliss! It’s that feeling that you just can’t live without the other person. We can’t get enough of the ecstasy! All we want to do is lounge in and absorb the essence of their energy, to be close, to exist as “one”. The hugs, the tender touches, the butterfly kisses, the sexual and sensual ecstasy. What is it, exactly, that draws us to a lover? The chemical chemistry is there and we are so in love with that feeling that we don’t pay attention to anything else. Nothing else matters; only the lovers exist. Then after a few weeks of lovers bliss the excitement tends to become part of “the norm” and we actually start talking and listening to each other. Thoughts and ideas come up and our only wish is to share this feeling with each other for the rest of our lives! Now we must start talking about and preparing for our future together; make plans, move forward and this is when we begin to realize that the other person has a totally different idea of how they want their life to be, and you want them to follow YOUR plan instead. “What you want is nowhere close to what I want!” Conflict arises, and tension. The heartbreak begins, followed by jealousy (he/she doesn’t give me much attention anymore) and resentment for not getting what you want, when you want it. You begin to realize it is a two way street, and the streets just happen to be on completely different continents. Some lovers actually do get lucky and find long term contentment with each other but I think for most of us it is a crash course in relationships and personalities, cause and effect, give and take, lessons in getting to know yourself and getting to know other people, and no matter how badly you want to get something from that other person they just may not know how to give that to you. It is neither your fault nor theirs, for that matter. Life is a movie, and we are simply actors in this movie. We all have roles in each other’s movies and we all come in and out at the necessary times to give comfort, share, learn, etc. and then we exit, stage left.
I am in no rush to start a one-on-one relationship nor do I have any interest in losing myself. I have dreams, goals and visions that I plan on bringing to fruition and I want to succeed in these dreams and in this lifetime. I want the financial success, my own house, space and freedom, a back yard that I can make into a fantasy garden and at the end of the day I simply want someone to be there, supporting me, loving me and saying “You Go Girl!”
Sabrina Jean McCulley